Update

So I didn't initially want to divulge information about a third surgery I had in September (maybe I felt a little vain?), but it's part of my journey and I think it's important that it's included with my story. The surgery was "minor" compared to the other two I'd previously had, however I think it came in as 2nd on the pain scale. Dr. Heinrich (still an amazing surgeon) did a little bit of scar revision and fat grafting (gross, right?), where she sucked fat (not nearly enough in my opinion) from my stomach and hips and flushed it around my implants to give them a softer, more balanced look. I'm extremely pleased with the results, and am SO ready to be done with procedures! No more!

The oncologist I'd been meeting with since day 1 left the health system that my insurance covers, so I met with a new oncologist, Dr. Murphy. She specializes in young women who are diagnosed with breast cancer, and immediately I noticed a difference between the two. She brought up the family aspect (we'd wanted to start ours just before I was diagnosed) and offered to revisit starting one sooner than later (not yet though). I'm not sure how I feel about that just yet - going off tamoxifen is terrifying, especially if the goal is pregnancy which would give me an overload of hormones, but it was beyond nice to hear a doctor who actually looked at it from my perspective instead of immediately jumping into statistics.

Jason and I did the Making Strides walk again this year (in October) and I'm happy to say we raised just under $1,000 for the cause thanks to my family and friends. Feels great to be part of an event that is bigger than just my experience!

That's all (for now)!
Cassie

Weekend Update

I had a post-op appointment on Thursday with Dr. Heinrich, who was pleased with how my healing is coming along. The swelling I saw just a few days after surgery is almost completely gone (as is the bruising), and the best part of all: I can sleep on my side again! After 4.5 months of sleeping on my back, I've finally made it through a few nights of not waking up at once or twice during my (when I'm lucky) 7 hours. Also, Jason can finally spoon me again! It's glorious :)

Dr. Heinrich also cleared me for physical activity so my sister Rachel and I took a lap around Lake Como to celebrate (I was allowed to walk before, but we were short on time).

Teaser for later in the week: Patient Advisory Committee

Ten

Ten days!  That's it, the time has finally come where I can say "surgery is next week!"  Jason and I met with Dr. Heinrich on Thursday to go over details of the surgery.  We talked about the size of implants I'll get (she'll test a few out before sewing me up to see what looks the most natural), what I can expect for pain (I'll be sore for a few days) and how it'll affect the progress I've made with my physical therapy (should actually make things better).  She said I'll be swollen for a few weeks, and I'll have to wear a compression bra of some sort to help with that.  I'll do whatever she says as long as it means I can get rid of these expanders! 

Yesssss!

Countdown

Three weeks to go; excited to get somewhat back to normal!  No more pain (I hope), no more rock-hugs to my friends/family, no more covering the lopsidedness with my hair. 

I am so beyond ready.

TGIF

I've survived my first week back in the office.  Of course, it wasn't a full week there, just 3 days, but it's a start!  I also have some pretty exciting news: New Boobs Day is officially happening on Wednesday, November 6th (only 82 days!).  I can't wait to get these rock-hard, uneven, armpit-bags outta here and some pretty new softies put in.  I don't even care that I'll have to go through more pain; it'll just bring me one step closer to feeling normal again! I've been told that this surgery is much easier than the one I had in June; I won't have any overnights in the hospital and I'll be back to work in the office within days of the operation.  Awesome!  I'll have (I do already!) so much to be grateful for at Thanksgiving!

My expansion yesterday went really well - getting a needle through a bruise didn't hurt as badly as I imagined it would, and I'm slightly less sore this week than I remember being last week. The ride to WI last night went fine too.  Something's up today though; I feel nauseous and have a slight headache.  I took the same dosage of pain meds I've been taking during the last couple expansions, but I have a feeling they have something to do with how I'm feeling.  I'm considering not keeping up with them today - I'd rather deal with the pain on it's own than this sick feeling I have right now. 
 

View from the passenger seat: a hot air balloon just as we got into Wisconsin.

I also think that the hot flashes have started (of course, it's a beautiful 75 and sunny right now, so that might have something to do with it).  They're nothing terrible, but I'll get super hot and take off the tshirt or sweatshirt I'm wearing, then I'll get super cold and have to put everything back on.  It's happening maybe once an hour, and I don't think they're intense as I imagined they'd be.  If this is it, I'll totally be able to handle it for the next 5 years.  I've been adding ground flax seed (thank you Joelle!) to my food and my mother-in-law Barbie just suggested incorporating more soy into my diet to minimize the flashes.  I'm totally up for trying any natural remedies, especially if they're healthy in other aspects too!

Making a Plan

​I think the beaming light of awesome that comes from good test results will be something that may take awhile to wear off.  Fine by me!  Still telling close friends about what’s going on - the list is getting shorter and shorter and it’s definitely easier to talk about it now.  I think my appetite is coming back a little and I’m tired, which means I’ll hopefully get a good night’s sleep tonight.  I’ve got a bunch of appointments this week and new doctors to meet.  So far so good!

I told my boss over a long lunch today and then she came with me to talk with our HR department. They were both extremely supportive and made me feel like there would be nothing I need to worry about on the work front.  I’m hoping I don’t have to take too much of my saved up vacation for this; I’d much rather use the time for other things! 

Late this afternoon Jason and I met with a plastic surgeon to discuss reconstruction options.  I’ll do implants in 4-5 months which means that during this first surgery, I’ll have tissue expanders put in to make room for them.  They’ll sit behind the muscles in my breasts and every week I’ll go in and they’ll inject saline until they’re at a size big enough to accommodate the implants.  Sounds like it’ll be a little uncomfortable for a few days while the skin/muscles adjust but I’m guessing that after going through the first surgery I should be able to handle it. 

This is what the expander looks like. 
The circle is magnetic and is where they'll use a needle to inject saline each week.

Hoping to get a better idea on a surgery date tomorrow - today at the meeting we discussed what I’ll need to do for the prep and it made it all very real!  It’s scary to think about, especially since I know I’ll have pain to manage, but I wish I could just go in and get it over with!  Waiting is the worst part!